A page burns in the fire at my campsite. There is no more proof of the error I made on that page. A trivial error it was, but an error nonetheless. As I watch the paper crumple and burn I wonder about ends. The ends of things. The ends of life. The paper is no more but in its place is a warm fire that continues to burn; life from death. Symbolic yes but full of meaning.
I love being on vacation. I never wear a watch on vacation. Although time is precious. I fill the day with activity but I am not a slave to the clock. Upon my return home I will no longer be free. Still a slave to the clock. Punch in at 8:00 a.m., Punch out at 4:00 p.m. The clock rules my day.
Strange how society works, isn’t it? Some thoughts don’t connect. Some people don’t connect, like me. A “conservative loner” by choice. I was actually described like this by an employer once. An irrelevant fact because I could not change my person, not for him, not for anybody. I am what I am. “A conservative loner.”
I have an innate sense of honesty. I posses an independence of mind, but I have not learned to moderate that trait. Blunt to a fault and impatient with subordinates, I have earned a reputation for being difficult and creating unnecessary tension among the crew of every social structure I serve.
Often misunderstood, Frequently misquoted, and always separated (isolated.) Why has this book become a personal analysis? Unknown. For now, back to
SILENT CACOPHONY
Yes! It is an oxymoron. But I am a moron who uses oxy on my pimples, so it is kind of suiting. Nah, I’m playing. (Kidding)
I have had a week of inconveniences, not a bad week, a week of inconveniences. I think that is the politically correct way to say it now.
That is the end of my weeklong jump back into time. The past seven posts were originally written by me in the Summer of 1995 or the Winter of 1996 in the original Silent Cacophony book that I was putting together. I hope you enjoyed this jump back in time as much as I did.
Tomorrow I will be back to my regular posting routine. This book is a lot shorter in length than I remembered. But it was the start to Silent Cacophony as you and I know it today. I hope you enjoyed this trip back in time.
5 responses to “A Page Burns”
Hi Chase.
I have enjoyed your trip back in time. Thanks for sharing your journals.
Interesting that you thought they were longer than they actually are. Maybe that means you’ve simply stretched and expanded your perspective since then…
What do you think it means?
I haven’t been sure all week if the posts are all about your thoughts back then, or if they still reflect who Chase March is today. Until I had sons I didn’t realise that there is really not as much difference between the sexes as I’d thought. Men/boys] need connection, acceptance, love, just as much as women/girls. I know how much rejection and lack of acceptance hurts. I hope you have some friends now who like you just the way you are…..
Hi Davina,
I’m glad you enjoyed it. The coil notebook wasn’t really a journal. I’m not quite sure what it was. It kind of feels like it should have been a blog.
I have kept a journal for quite some time now. I have chapters and chapters of that. A lot of it I wouldn’t want to share online.
But I do think my perspective has changed a bit since then. Yet, I still recognize those thoughts and still agree with them. Strange, eh?
Hi Molly,
I think most of those thoughts still reflect who am I today.
And I think it is important to remember that men, and young men still have feelings too. Great point!
Thanks for your kind words.
Hi Chase,
This has been a wonderful trip back in time. It has given us insight as to where you came from and how far you’ve progressed. You’re well on your way.
Thanks Barbara!