It’s Just the Way We’re Built

I don’t know why I always manage to put my foot in my mouth. I’ve done it so many times over the years, you’d think I would’ve learned by now. I guess I haven’t though because I did it again today.

It was a professional development day and the students had the day off. We had to travel to another school in a different district to attend these workshops. I was impressed with this conference. The workshops were very well presented and I got a lot out of them. A hot lunch was served and it was excellent. And as an added bonus they had free massages throughout the day.

The massages were assigned randomly and we were told when we registered if we were to get one or not. I managed to find my way onto the list. Now, I had no interest in getting a massage so I asked them to give it to somebody else. “No problem” they said.

I talked to a colleague shortly after that. She teaches at my school and I know that we are the same age. Anyway, she was excited that she made it on the list. She asked if I did. I told her I did but I gave it away. She asked why. I said, “I don’t know, I’m young and vigorous.”

“What does that make me?” she retorted, “Old and decrepit?”

I said, “Why do girls always do that? They always assume the opposite of what you say. That’s not what I meant.”

Next break, I bumped into her again and I knew what to say this time. I said, “What I meant to say earlier is that I had no interest in getting a massage so I thought I’d pass it on to someone who’d appreciate it more.”

She said, “I know that is what you were supposed to say but you didn’t.”

I told her that I should’ve learned not to put my foot in my mouth by now. She said she thinks it is just the way guys are built. You know what? I’m positive she is right. She always seems to be about everything else. So next time I put my foot in my mouth, cut me a break, it’s just the way I’m built.