How Do You Know You Are A Teacher?

I got this in my inbox from a fellow teacher this week. It is one of those author-unknown forwards that seem to travel around the earth a few dozen times. I got a bit of a chuckle out of it so I thought I’d post it up and share it. Normally I don’t like the FWD:FWD:FWD emails and I don’t like to forward them on. There’s enough email to read without them. So I won’t forward it to any inboxes. I’ll just post it here, okay?

How do you know you are a teacher?

1. You can hear 30 voices behind you and know exactly which one belongs to the child out of line.

2. You get a secret thrill out of laminating something.

3. You walk into a store and hear the words “It’s Ms/Mr.________” and know you have been spotted.

4. You have 30 people that accidentally call you Mom/Dad at one time or another.

5. You can eat a multi-course meal in under twenty-five minutes.

6. You’ve trained yourself to go to the bathroom at two distinct times of the day: lunch and prep period.

7. You start saving other people’s trash, because most likely, you can use that toilet paper tube or plastic butter tub for something in the classroom.

8. You believe the teachers’ lounge should be equipped with a margarita machine.

9. You want to slap the next person who says, “Must be nice to work 9 to 3 and have summers off.

10. You believe chocolate is a food group.

11. You can tell if it’s a full moon without ever looking outside.

12. You believe that unspeakable evils will befall you if anyone says, “Boy, the kids sure are mellow today.”

13. You feel the urge to talk to strange children and correct their behaviour when you are out in public.

14. You believe in aerial spraying of Ritalin.

15. You think caffeine should be available in intravenous form.

16. You spend more money on school stuff than you do on your own children.

17. You can’t pass the school supply aisle without getting at least five items!

18. You ask your friends if the left hand turn he just made was a “good choice or a bad choice.

19. You find true beauty in a can full of perfectly sharpened pencils.

20. You are secretly addicted to hand sanitizer and finally,

21. You understand instantaneously why a child behaves a certain way after meeting his or her parents.

Of course, I don’t believe in a few of these points. #8 is inappropriate. #14 is crazy because I don’t think kids need to be medicated if they show signs of ADHD, everyone does so there are better ways to deal with it. Other than that, I think this list was worth a laugh. Hope you enjoyed it!

6 Comments on How Do You Know You Are A Teacher?

  1. Oh, admit it, you do want a marguerita machine in the Teacher’s Lounge, Chase.

    But I do agree with you on dumping the Ritalin line. ADHD is just a different way of thinking, not a disease.

  2. Believe it or not, I am a teetotaler. I don’t drink. I wouldn’t mind a milkshake machine though or a frostee machine. That would be cool.

  3. Or a slush puppy machine. Yeah, that would be great, except maybe for the blue tongue part. S

  4. !this is wonderful and to the point- right on- and could never have been written by someone other than a teacher and a dedicated one at that!

  5. i plan on being a teacher do you have any advice on furture teachers? im a senior in high school and i am getting training while i am still in school and its a blast. and i love writing i write about every little thing i even had a poem that i once wrote published in a book and that was great i plan having a book published by my 21st birthday.

  6. I was like you. I knew that I wanted to be a teacher before I went to university. Here is my advice;

    1) Work with kids as much and in as many ways as possible.

    I volunteered at my old public school once a week and it was a great experience. I worked at the Y.M.C.A and ran a before and after-school program. I volunteered as a Scout Leader once a week.

    2)Build up your volunteer experience.

    Doing the above things are great ways to build up your volunteer experience and look great on your resume. There are many other things you can do to like be a tutor, a coach, a volunteer at the public library or local recreation centre.

    3)Get some references.

    Having professional references can really help you out in getting into teacher’s college. So get the respect of people who work or volunteer with. Ask for a letter of reference from as many people as you can.

    4)Start a professional portfolio

    Make up a binder with a title page. Get plastic sleeve covers and collect things that show your dedication to education. Have a section for reference letters, lessons that you have taught, etc. You can find some websites on portfolios to help you.

    5)Get good marks

    You need to have good marks and experience to get into teacher’s college. So work hard to get both.

    6)Do it because you love it.

    You need to have passion to be a teacher. If you don’t enjoy working with children, find something else to do.

    Well, that is my advice. I hope it helps. If you want to know more you can click on my email link and I will be happy to answer any questions that you may have.

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